Goodbye, for now.

"You get a strange feeling when you're about to leave a place...like you'll not only miss the people you love but you'll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you'll never be this way ever again."-Azar Nafisi

Three months ago, I remember packing the day before I left, and being ridiculously scared for what I was about to do. I was going to a foreign country, where I didn't speak the language, didn't know anybody and honestly, knew nothing about. I cried in the airport saying goodbye to my parents, and all the way to the gate. I cried as the plane was taking off (both in LA and in New York), but then once I got here I was finally excited and a little bit less scared. I arrived in the miniature town of Paderno del Grappa and asked myself the same question about a million times: "Why on earth did I decide to do this again?" Throughout the first week, I had to convince myself every morning when I woke up why I was here and why I wanted to be here. It wasn't easy.

But now I look back on those days and laugh at why I was so scared and dramatic about all of it. Since I did this, I feel like I can do anything. I'm not scared to navigate a subway system in an unfamiliar town, or analyze a map on a street corner in the rain, because I know I can do it easily. And somewhere in between the blur of speeding cars, airplane rides, studying and getting to know new people, I felt at home. I can't remember exactly when it happened, but I know that it did and that is what makes it so hard to leave.

The quote above could not more accurately describe how I feel about all of this. It is so true that part of the reason it's so difficult to leave this place is because I know I will never feel this way, or be the very person that I am right now ever again. But that is almost comforting to me because I know that I am capable of so much more than I was 3 months ago, and that from now on I am going to live my life differently whether I try to or not. Seeing foreign places, embracing different cultures, and meeting foreign people has opened my eyes to the world so much more than I thought it would.

Tomorrow I will be back in The United States for probably a while, but I am already planning my next adventure. I plan to keep this blog going, and comment on experiences and observations that I have. It is a work in progress, but I have been wanting to start a blog for a few years, and I am so happy that going abroad is what inspired me. I have gained an insane drive to travel, and I know I will never stay in one place too long ever again.

Leaving a special piece of my heart here in Italy...
Ciao